Monday, April 13, 2020

Quarantine#1, Parody of Take A Chance on Me - originally sung by Abba

Quarantine #1
March 31, 2020
If you’ve got some time
In this trying time,
Honey please hear me
Stay away from me
If you need me, that’s too bad
Stay away from me
If you’ve got no place to go
Stay away from me
If you’re all alone
Well, friend, we are all alone
And it’s best if ye
Stay away from me
Gonna do my very best
From my head to toes
I don’t want the COVID test
Poking up my nose
Stay away from me
That’s all I ask of you, mister
Stay away from me
We can’t go dancing
But we can go walking
As long as we’re far apart
Listen to some music
Maybe just talking
Sharing thoughts from our hearts
‘Cause you know I’ve got
So much that I wanna do
Don’t wanna lose it all because of NINETEEN
I wanna travel some day
Some place far away
But I think you know
Right now I can’t go
I’m a hermit now
You should be one, too
We’re in quarantine
Stay away from me
Wear your mask and I will, too
Gonna be at home
Wash your hands (who me? Yes, you!)
Don’t go out and roam
(musical interlude)
Stay away from me
Come on, give me a break, will you?
Stay away from me
(very long musical interlude unless you want to hear the whole song over again)
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba
Ba-ba-ba, ba, ba, ba ba
Stay away from me
Stay away from me
Gonna do my very best
To be virus-free
To not need that test


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Quarantine #2, A Parody of "Downtown" (original sung by Petula Clark)

Quarantine #2
March 20, 2020

When you’re alone and life is making you lonely
You can never go - downtown.
When you’ve got trouble, wait, it’s going to double,
But don’t try to go - downtown.
Just listen to the chirping of the birds you see around you,
Linger on your front porch where no viruses surround you.
There you’ll be safe.
The threat is much less at home
You can watch television, sleep,  or play on your phone
Just don’t go downtown
Things are too scary in downtown
The risks are too hairy in downtown
COVID is waiting for you.
Just enjoy all the time you’ve been given
Forget the movies downtown
Away from your boss it’ll just feel like heaven
No fighting traffic downtown
Just listen to advice from all the doctors, that they give ya
Maintain your distance, brother, so that COVID doesn’t get ya
Happy you’ll be.
Your family’s so much safer home
You can play games together or make up a poem
So stay there
Where all the germs are clean, stay there
Where you can have sweet dreams, stay there
You’re gonna be alright now.
Someday we’ll be free again to roam throughout the city,
Someday we’ll have reason to get dressed up real pretty,
Won’t that be great?
So maybe I’ll shoot you a text
We can forget all our troubles and not get too vexed
And think of some day
Things will be fine, you know, someday
TP’ll be back in stock, someday
Just don’t go downtown til then
Downtown
Downtown
Downtown
Downtown


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